How to use:
Instead of sharing your opinion right away, ask:
“I’m genuinely curious—what’s your main concern about this?”
“What’s one thing about this issue that you wish more people understood?”
Why it works: Neuroscience shows that curiosity lowers defensiveness in others and opens the door for deeper conversation.
How to use:
When you hear something you do agree with, say it out loud:
“I actually agree with you that ____.”
“We both care about ____—even if we see the path differently.”
Why it works: This “agree-then-differentiate” tactic is proven to lower hostility and keep people engaged (Harvard Negotiation Project).
How to use:
Instead of “I believe X because it’s true,” try:
“I changed my mind about X after I saw ___ happen to a friend/myself.”
“This issue got personal for me when ___.”
Why it works: Sharing your journey, not just your stance, makes you relatable and invites connection, not debate.
How to use: